13 Things I Love about Elf

1. It’s the greatest Christmas movie of the 21st Century. One of the few original, modern day Christmas legends.

2. Buddy the Elf. Most people love him but do we really appreciate the unique sensation that is Buddy the MFing Elf? Think about it; this created a whole new Christmas character and mythos. It’s like the 21st Century equivalent of creating Rudolph or the Grinch or Frosty the Snowman. It hadn’t happened since, what? The Nightmare Before Christmas with Jack Skellington? Most new Christmas movies are just rehashes of older classics (Christmas Carol/Grinch) or basic “families spending time together and finding the meaning of Christmas” movies. Elf is a modern fairy tale. There are Buddy the Elf dolls and costumes. There’s an Elf musical. There’s no Fred Claus musical. Love Actually doesn’t have a children’s book. Bad Santa isn’t even a new character, he’s just a typical mall Santa with a slightly worse alcohol problem (plus Bad Santa sucks after the first viewing). Buddy the Elf is a phenomenon, a milestone of 21st Century pop culture, a newly created icon that people of all ages and races can and will enjoy for holiday seasons to come.

3. Will Ferrell. Ferrell’s awkward sincerity is perfect for the role and it’s in its most perfect form here. Ferrell is very hit or miss. When he’s on, and when his character and the story are well developed, he is one of the funniest people in the world. And then there are movies like Bewitched or Sherlock and Watson. This character was seemingly made directly from the best of his DNA and he completely engulfs the role. When the boss at the department store says that Santa is coming and he yells out, “Santa!! I know him!” it is so pure and genuine it could make a stone smile. It’s so silly (kinda stupid, even) but he is so sincere and the character is made of such pure happiness and joy, that it all comes together to create a sense of childlike whimsy.

4. Whimsy. The best word to describe the movie is whimsical. And it’s the best part about the movie. It is very silly. It is very clever, with sharp line after sharper line. The dialogue, the characters, the scenes, everything is memorable in the best ways. But more than anything, every moment in the film is filled with the intent of bringing joy. It’s truly like watching a movie in a sea of swirly twirly gum drops. Elf, the character and the movie, just want to make everybody happy. That is their entire purpose, and they knock it out of the candy cane forest.

5. Heartwarming. Like any good Christmas movie, it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. There are heartwarming moments between Buddy and his two father figures, heartwarming scenes between Buddy and the kid, between James Caan and the kid, between Buddy and Zooey, even between Buddy and Mr. Narwhal.

6. Mr. Narwhal. The Penguin. Leon the Snowman. Such great characters and they only appear for a few minutes. But that opening scene is so important in setting that whimsical tone. Every moment, every character, is intentionally fun and quirky.

7. Scenery and costumes. Right off we’re not supposed to take anything too seriously. Even the credits sequence is silly. We are in the North Pole, but it’s clearly a set and there are what look like cut out paper snowflakes falling. It feels like the inside of a snow globe. Then we see a Jazz Snowman and other cartoon characters. It’s like Elf was born from the classic Christmas cartoon specials of the 60s, but then he travels to the real world and grows up to be a real human. He’s a Christmas Pinocchio. The Elf house at the North Pole is great, too, all the grey wood makes all the elves’ colorful costumes pop. Then Buddy creates his own Winter Wonderland at home and the department store. Again, that’s the whole movie: Will Ferrell making everything more fun and carefree.

8. Music. The soundtrack is great, so many Christmas bangers, but more than that, music is a main element of the story. It’s how Buddy introduces himself to his biological dad (a singing telegram). It’s how he gets closer with Zooey (Baby It’s Cold Outside duet in the bathroom). And of course it’s a mantra of Santa’s elves: “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” Such a great line and ethos, and I love how they connect back to it at the climax with Zooey leading everybody singing in the street. It also shows that sometimes you gotta force the Christmas Spirit. Maybe you're not feeling it. Maybe stuff has got you down. But the beauty of this time of year is that we as a society, for many many years, have forced the joy upon each other. Get people gifts. Visit family and friends. Sing songs. Listen to joyful songs endlessly, maybe even too much. Humans have known since we have existed that this time of year needs some respite and forced joy or we wont make it through. And if you do force it, it starts to become natural. Like how forcing a smile leads to a real smile.

9. References to Other Classics. The first and most obvious is the original Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. The opening scenes in the North Pole are a direct ode to that movie and that style of animation. There are the elves (one who feels out of place) and Santa’s workshop and the talking snowman and the singing woodland creatures. It’s a tribute to the classic but it also enhances the fish out of water aspect. When Buddy gets to Central Park and tries to pet the raccoon, he (and we) realize these aren’t the same woodland creatures from the North Pole. Then there are the references to Miracle on 34th Street. The main reference is that he works at Gimbels, Macy’s main competition in Miracle (the fact that a main setting is a department store is a reference in itself. Then there’s the mail room scene. Buddy makes friends with all the workers, which eventually makes him closer with his dad, and Kris Kringle is saved by the mailroom workers in Miracle. When Buddy cuts all the snowflakes it looks like Edward Scissorhands (another great Christmas movie). Then there’s the scene of Buddy on the bridge feeling dejected, a clear reference to the godawful It’s a Wonderful Life. Lastly, and the only knock against the movie, is the similarity to The Santa Clause. The ending of Elf, with Santa in his sleigh getting chased through a park and relying on people’s belief in him to fly, is a lot like the ending in the original The Santa Clause (a good Christmas movie). It’s fine, and it works for Elf, but…watch both and tell me they’re not extremely similar.

10. Lines. Brilliant, hilarious lines from everyone at all times. I could just copy the whole script to show all the great lines. Even little random bits of dialogue, like when they are talking about children’s book ideas. One guy suggests, "a tribe of asparagus children, but they're self-conscious about the way their pee smells." That is objectively hilarious, and it’s just a random throwaway line. Yet, it also connects to a later scene, when Dinklage is rejecting story ideas: “tomatoes are too vulnerable”. What seem like throwaway jokes actually work together to create a unified vision of absurdity and comedy. Like the running joke that Buddy loves syrup; that’s hilarious on its own, but then the guy in the mailroom sneaks “syrup” into his coffee and gets Buddy drunk for the first time. That is funny on its own as well, but it means more because of the running joke about syrup, and it also leads directly to the conflict and eventual resolution with his dad. Absolutely brilliant.

11. Supporting Cast. Everyone kills it. Everyone. And after multiple viewings, you catch little expressions or idiosyncrasies that fill every scene with humor. The lines are brilliant on their own, but they wouldn’t be as memorable without the timing and delivery of Zooey Deschanel and James Caan and Mary Steenbergen and Bob Newhart and friggin Ed Asner and Peter friggin Dinklage. Even Artie Lange is great as the “beef and cheese” Santa. No matter the length of the role, everyone gives a standout performance. And the kid from A Christmas Story is one of the elves at the Workshop. That’s cool.

12. Writing. Besides the killer lines and almost perfect script, writing is a main element of the story, which I always appreciate. Buddy’s dad is a publisher, who doesn’t really care if kids’ books contain the last few pages as long as they pay for them. He is trying to come up with a story before Christmas to save the company. Buddy ends up becoming the story and saving the day. And then, in an example of life copying fiction, a real children’s book was made about Buddy the Elf.

13. Directing. This was Jon Favreau’s second movie. Not bad for Monica’s boyfriend who wanted to fight in the UFC. This movie was so good they let him direct Iron Man even though the only other movie he had directed was Zathura. I can’t give Will Ferrell all the credit for the whimsical nature of the movie. From the decision to have cartoons in the beginning, to the musical choices, to the pacing and everything else a director oversees, this succeeds on literally every level.

I Love You All...Class Dismissed.

13 Things I Love about The Shining

1. Cinematography. From the opening shot of the lake and mountain, to the last shot of a frozen Jack Nicholson and a spooky old photograph, this is such a beautiful movie. It’s definitely an Art film with a Capital A by a very serious Film Director (although Kubrick didn’t actually shoot the opening shot; never believe in the lone genius myth, it takes a village to create a masterpiece) but it’s also highly enjoyable. Everything is so perfectly orchestrated, and each shot is done with a sense of purpose, balance and mystery. The cinematography does more than just look good, too, it accentuates the themes of loneliness and despair. The opening shot is memorably gorgeous but it also imbues the viewer with a sense of dread by showing us just how isolated they are from civilization.

2. Music. That opening shot is not only memorable for its scope and the impressive scenery, it’s actually terrifying! But how? Why? It’s just a panning shot of water and trees! Something so natural and beautiful becomes disturbing because of the intense music. The rising chords make your heart race and your skin crawl with anticipation, as if some horrible force is just out of sight. The music throughout the movie is vital to creating the tense, eerie atmosphere

3. Sounds. Beyond the intense music, I love all the little sounds throughout the movie. It takes place in an empty hotel in the middle of nowhere, so every sound is magnified. When Jack is “working,” the sound of the typewriter ricochets off the walls of the giant room. When he takes a “break” to toss the tennis ball, that loud “splonk” noise echoes down the empty hallways. When Danny rides around on his trike, the wheels make a different sound on the carpet than on the hard wood floors, and it takes me back to riding my Big Wheels around the house. These sounds aren’t all that important individually but they come together to create a feeling. Kubrick tries to engage with all of our senses. When scared, the tiniest sound can become a cannon shot, and that is often the sensation here. Every single sound is intensified, which heightens all of our senses and almost makes us feel like we are in the hotel. Every single aspect of the movie matters. Which brings me to…

4. Colors. Kubrick always creates these bizarre settings, like the Milk Bar in Clockwork Orange. The settings here are all weird and awesome, and the color schemes are incredible. The red and white bathroom where Jack talks with the former keeper is made for a horror movie. I’ve never really seen a bathroom like that, and if I did, I would assume a murderous ghost would approach me. Then there’s the infamous carpeting. The red and black pattern is hypnotic and disturbing. How is a carpet disturbing? Is it just because I’ve seen the movie several times and associate the carpet with the events of the movie, or is it objectively disturbing? Maybe both. There’s also this aggressively ugly but awesome green and purple carpeting with green and white walls in Room 237. And of course, RED RUM, and the red doors of the elevator which foreshadow the infamous scene of the blood pouring out.

5. Room 237. The cook, Halloran, tells Danny this room is off limits. Something bad happened here before. Later, Danny goes in. We don’t see what happens, he just shows up a few moments later in his mom’s room sucking his thumb with a ripped sweater. He tells his mom a woman tried to strangle him, so Jack checks it out. At first it’s a hot naked lady, then it’s a not hot naked old lady. This moment probably freaked me out the most as a young man watching for the first time. Talk about playing with my emotions! Room 237 is also the name of a great documentary about the many conspiracy theories surrounding The Shining. It delves into the weird but plausible theories as well as the not as plausible, but it’s a lot of fun and gives great insight into the movie regardless of whether you believe the theories. Besides that documentary, there’s also the episode of The Simpson’s that parodies The Shining (“The Shinning”) which is one of the greatest network tv episodes ever made. When a film spawns a great documentary and a classic parody, it’s something special.

6. Scatman Crothers! Every time I hear his name I sing in my head “Bee bop bop bada bop, bop bop bada bop…Scatman!” He plays the cook, Halloran, who shares Danny’s ability to “shine.” He tells Danny about the gift and tries to warn him about the hotel. His best moment is when he hears about the storm on the news, and gets worried about the family. He’s rocking some fly pajamas, lying on his bed in his very 70’s monochromatic room, surrounded by pictures of beautiful naked women in Afros hanging on the wall. He’s the best.

7. Shelley Duval. A lot of people hate on her or her performance but I think it’s perfect for the movie. First off, as far as the story itself, she is the only one who takes care of Danny, she does all of the work taking care of the hotel, and she takes care of Jack’s crazy ass. Then, she rightfully freaks out when freaky shit starts happening and her husband is clearly losing his mind. Her freakouts are key to creating the feeling of terror. She’s all alone in a giant hotel in the middle of a mountain, trying to protect her only son from her insane husband. She helps sell the true terror of that situation. I also think she’s largely in the film because of her unique look. She has a very distinctive face with lots of sharp angles, and it fits so well with the scenery and cinematography. Her sharp angles are framed by the angles of the hotel, and she becomes part of the scenery. She wears these weird outfits that simply exist for their aura and to add another element of weirdness. She’s great.

8. Jack Nicholson. Absolutely insane. This is his master work. He has great lines and delivers them perfectly. He also has a distinctive face, in particular his mouth, which can effectively change from an Innocent grin to a raving mad ear to ear smirk in a moment. There’s too many great lines to recount them all, but one stood out to me while watching it this time. Duval runs into his room and tells him about the woman in Room 237 who hurt Danny. He gives her this disgusted look and says, “Are you out of your fucking mind?” because there’s obviously nobody else in the hotel. This from a man who was literally just talking to a ghost before Duval came in. Even at the beginning, when he’s a seemingly normal guy, there’s this underlying creepiness due to his mannerisms and expressions. Then, when he eventually completely loses it, he is simultaneously hilarious and horrifying.

9. Disorientation. Kubrick keeps the audience constantly disoriented. It’s most obvious with the labyrinth. Early on, we follow Danny and his mom as they walk through, turning and backtracking, until they find the center. Then at the end, Danny loses his father in the labyrinth, where Jack meets his demise. Inside of the hotel, when we follow Danny around on his trike, the layout of the hotel doesn’t make any sense, which was on purpose. It’s like a maze. And of course, the carpeting, another optical illusion to get lost in.

10. Unexplained Mystery. Ambiguity is a tricky feat to pull off. There needs to be some kid of explanation to satisfy the audience’s thirst for understanding, but a little unsolved mystery can keep the audience engaged and make the story more enticing. Kubrick unsurprisingly pulls this off well. Who was that lady in room 237 exactly? We never find out. Who is that getting a blowjob from someone in a bear costume? And just WTF was that? If Jack was in the photograph from 1921, and if he “was always here” as he’s told, is this some sort of time loop? Is it a prediction? Is Jack a ghost? Are those creepy twins really there? How many people have the "Shining" and how’d they get it? We don’t know exactly, but not finding those things out doesn’t hurt the story or feel incomplete. It feels like there are just some things we’ll never know, and that’s ok because that’s life. It also allows for endless speculation, which is fun.

11. Native American influence. One of the theories discussed in the documentary is the underlying Native American metaphor. Watching it with this in mind, it becomes glaringly obvious. Native designs (Navajo and Apache, specifically) are used heavily throughout the hotel (window curtains, paintings) and Shelley Duvall wears a ridiculous yellow coat with Native imagery. In the storage with all of the giant cans of food (all real products, with real, classic labels—it’s the little things!) there are a bunch of Calumet cans that seem to stand out from the rest. The Calumet logo is a Native in a headdress. But most importantly, we are told early on that the hotel was built on top of an “Indian burial ground,” and some workers even had to fight off Natives during construction. Well then…should’ve never messed with that burial ground, whiteys!

12. Themes. The most prominent themes are loneliness, creative frustration, alcoholism, and regret, all of which feed off one another, and all of which are emphasized in almost every scene. The scenery, the settings, the expressions on people’s faces…everything contributes to these motifs. The setting in particular captures a sense of loneliness and isolation in almost every shot. It's rare for a film's themes to be so well reinforced through every aspect of the film. The themes are also tangled up with the mysterious elements; did Jack start seeing ghosts because of loneliness and creative frustration, or were the ghosts really there? His wife sees the bear-man giving a guy a BJ, so were they really there, or was she losing her mind, too? Or both?

13. Writing. I love Stephen King, but I’m so glad Kubrick made this his own. I never read the book so I don’t know if there are major differences, but I know King hates the movie. He should get over that and let more directors change up his books for movies. Staying too close to the source can actually hurt some movies. Some of the stuff in King’s books doesn’t need to be on screen. Neither IT movie included the adolescent gang bang did they? Let’s be real, does anyone remember The Shining made-for-tv movie, which King oversaw and that more closely followed the book? No. But more than just the script, writing itself is a key plot point to the story. All of the themes stem from writing: the loneliness of writing, the frustration it can cause, the looming alcoholism, and then the regret of not doing more or being better. Regret often comes with writing because writing requires reflection, and Jack has a lot of regrets and refuses to reflect honestly. King on the other hand has spoken about his regrets, in particular his past alcoholism and drug abuse. Jack is basically a stand in for who King could’ve become, which is kinda scary for his wife and kids, but it sure made for a great character.

I Love You All...Class Dismissed. 

13 Things I Love about The Exorcist: A Perfect Supernatural Horror Movie

1. The pacing. Some might call it slow. Those people don’t understand movies. Those “slow” moments serve several purposes. They make the insane scenes more impactful. There has to be a story that properly leads up to the head spinning and projectile vomiting for those scenes to have an emotional impact beyond just disgust, something that more recent films seem to forget. Those scenes also help create an atmosphere by focusing on things like characters and setting.

2. The settings. It opens in a holy city in northern Iraq, and they really went to a holy city in northern Iraq to shoot a total of 15 minutes of screen time. The attention to details matter. They also filmed in actual buildings at Georgetown University (the author of the book, William Peter Blatty, went to Georgetown). Also, one of the priests in the movie is a real Jesuit priest. All of those details help create a sense of realism and a tangible sense of place. That matters.

3. The stairs. The Exorcist stairs at Georgetown walked so the Joker stairs in the Bronx could fly. Truly iconic. 

4. The music. The Exorcist theme song (a snippet from Tubular Bells) walked so the Halloween theme song could fly. Also iconic. 

5. The slow build. I’ll reiterate this: the pacing is so important. To start off, we see an old priest searching for something in Iraq. Why is he here? What does this have to do with anything? Why are the first words we hear in a movie about Christian exorcisms “allahu akbar,” part of a Muslim chant? Why are those damn dogs barking so viciously? We don’t know what the hell is going on and there’s a sense of mystery and uneasiness at all times. Then we head to America and spend some time meeting a mother and her little girl. We are told that the little girl is acting strangely and we see her going through this horrible medical procedure. Then we see her come downstairs during her mother’s dinner party and tell an astronaut, “you’re gonna die up there” right before she pees on the carpet. It’s at this point we know shit's gonna get wild. But everything so far (including this scene) has been very real, nothing supernatural yet, just hinting at it and setting the tone.

6. Skepticism. Questioning of faith. The main priest, Father Karras, is a caring, honest portrayal of a priest/psychologist who loses his mother and starts to lose his faith. That also adds to the uneasiness; this is a man who dedicated his life to god, yet he is having doubts. He especially has doubts about the reality of exorcisms. Watching now, I think this is one of the main reasons I was drawn to this movie as a teen. That’s when I started to question and eventually lose my faith. I don’t believe in exorcisms or even god, but I could relate to a man who questioned his faith and believed in science (that’s why I loved Scully in the X-Files...and Steven in Nacho Libre). I love stories about the supernatural and appreciate the idea of the supernatural, but I relate more to people who question its existence. The whole movie is an examination of the meaning of faith and the forces of good and evil, and while the film certainly creates a sense of surrealism, it is grounded in realism, from the real settings and people, to the real emotions the characters feel in the face of the supernatural.

7. The horrors of modern science. Regan undergoes an EEG and they stab a giant fucking needle in her throat and let blood squirt out onto her chest. Then her head is put in this old cat-scan-like machine that makes a loud knocking sound. It’s uncomfortable, distressing…it was the most disturbing part of the movie, and it had nothing to do with possessions. It was a completely realistic portrayal of a completely real procedure. Besides making your skin crawl, it also makes the audience empathize with this little girl even more than audiences normally empathize with children. It’s not like a lot of other evil child movies (like the awesome The Omen) where the kid is weird and creepy from the start. She’s a normal cute kid forced to go through this horrifying treatment. This is important once she starts flipping out. That too is something forced upon her, and like the priests do, we have to see her humanity even when she’s saying things like…

8. “Let Jesus fuck you!” Oh my gawd this line and scene. The first scene where the bed is knocking around is whatever. Then comes the scene where she starts flipping out, and it’s loud, and the voice is upsetting, and what this little girl is screaming is so vulgar, and the reactions from the adults are so pure…it’s just terrifying. Soon after that, she’s stabbing herself in the crotch with a crucifix and screaming “Let Jesus Fuck you” and putting her mother’s face in her bloody crotch. Jesus, man.

9. The spider crab walk. I watched the Director’s cut, which included possessed Regan crawling upside-down/backwards down the stairs. Friedkin cut this from the original, and it makes sense (he thought it appeared too early in the movie and he hadn't set the stage yet) but I’m glad he put it back in. In this version, she stops at the bottom of the stairs and pukes blood. In the original deleted scene, she continues crabwalking toward her mother and flicking her tongue out. I like both but kinda wish they kept that original scene in.

10. Directing style. There are several weird, unique camera angles. There is a lot of symbolism and symbols and images are flashed briefly on screen at times to increase the feeling of uneasiness. One of the most famous “flashes” is the face of a demon during the final exorcism. It’s even creepier because it’s a quick flash. You can miss it if you blink, and even if you see it, you question if it was really there.

11. Cinematography. There are some beautiful interior and exteriro shots. One of the most iconic shots is of Father Merrin arriving by taxi, then standing under the streetlight as fog surrounds him and he looks up at the window of Regan’s room. It’s a beautiful shot in and of itself, but it is also a mirror/callback to a shot from the opening scene, in which Father Merrin finds the statue of Pazuzu. The statue is on a rock, and Merrin faces off with it as the sun glares behind them and the heat creates a visible haze. That shot foreshadows the shot of him arriving at Regan’s and becomes even more powerful. Something evil is at work here.

12. The performances. Everyone here is great. Linda Blair came out of nowhere to make an everlasting mark on cinema. The puking and head spinning and swearing wouldn't be as effectively gross as they are without her performance. Her smirk is deliciously delirious. Ellen Burstyn proves she was killing the game long before she finally got her accolades with Requiem for a Dream. The main priest Father Karras was Stephen Miller, known more as a playwright, but he was perfect here. It helps that he studied at a Jesuit University. The old priest, Father Merrin, is played by a 44 year old Max von Sydow and his makeup is probably the worst part of the movie. But at the same time, he's meant to look old and beat up, and he certainly does.

13. Behind the scenes insanity. One of the guys working the EEG ended up murdering someone in real life. Linda Blair and Ellen Burstyn suffered back injuries because Friedkin insisted on actually tossing them around. Burstyn damaged her coccyx in the scene where Regan slaps her because she was actually tossed to the ground by a grown man, and her scream of pain is 100% real. She was not happy with Friedkin for using the actual scream, but…it works. The 70s, baby! There are so many other stories too, like the fact they had to take Linda Blair on a promotional tour to prove to people that she wasn’t really possessed (although that itself might have been a promotional tool). One of my favorite stories is that of the voice of the demon. Blair did a lot of the voice work, often distorted with vocal effects, but Mercedes McCambridge did the demon's voice. She was a semi-retired voice actress and recovering alcoholic. When she was offered the job, she consulted with her priest about it because she felt that she could easily embody a demon when she drank. So she jumped back on the wagon, got raging drunk, started chainsmoking because she thought it made her sound even worse, had guys strap her down and put a mic in front of here, and helped create history.

I Love You All...Class Dismissed. 

The Elterich Cottage in Rhode Island

“Some places are like people. Some shine and some don’t.” –Dick Hallorann, The Shining

For 30 years, the Elterich Cottage in South Kingston, Rhode Island shined. A spacious house tucked away in the woods, within a short driving distance of several beaches, it served as the perfect setting for birthdays, weekends, vacations, spending time with family, partying with friends, or just getting away for a night.

I was 9 when my parents bought the house, set back a good 100 yards from Matunuck School House Road. The dirt driveway, commonly referred to as the entrance to the Batcave, took travelers on a windy path through the woods and eventually opened up to a large grass patch next to a brown, 2-story (including the basement) house and a wooden deck. The deck was massive, large enough to hold 30 years of family gatherings and parties.

A large staircase led from the main deck to a smaller deck and the front door. I always hated sweeping the leaves and sticks off the decks and stairs as a kid. It felt like half of my day was spent sweeping, although it probably took all of 10 minutes. Even on vacation, my parents made sure I understood hard work and responsibility.

I realized early on how lucky I was to have a "vacation" home. It's just not a thing most people have. It took me a little longer to appreciate my parents' openness with the house. When I  was young, it felt obvious that my friends would be able to stay with me for the weekend, and go to the beach and eat burgers and fish and corn on the cob and play ping pong. But not every parent is willing to do that for their kids and kids' friends. My parents also let family and friends stay there when they weren't using it, something else a lot of people wouldn't do, not without charging a crazy amount anyway.

The stairs to the front door of the house have presented a problem in the last few years as my mother has lost the ability to walk. My dad had an electric stair chair installed, which helped for a while. Fortunately, Gremlins never toyed with it and shot my mom up into the night sky, but it was still a lot of extra work to get to a house that was supposed to provide a restful getaway.

More than that, though, maintaining a second house was just too much. We would all have loved to keep the house forever, but the reality is that it cost money and required a lot of effort from my Dad to maintain. Besides, it wasn't getting much use, certainly not enough to warrant the time, money, and effort. We're 90 minutes away, and I'm not really a huge beach guy anyway; one reason I liked the house so much growing up was that it wasn't right on the beach, crowded in with other cookie cutter cottages. My brother and his family are even further away, and the same goes for most of my family. As far as spending weekends there with a big group of friends, it's hard to get a group of friends together nearby, let alone in a different state. Plus people have kids and we're at the age where everyone wants their own bed; sleeping on the floor with some pillows next to three other guys just won't cut it anymore. It's a decent sized house, but long gone are the days when 10-12 people could stay over night comfortably.

Ahh, youth.

It's sad to say goodbye and not have the option of "heading down to Rhode Island" at any time, but it was a necessary step. Moving or selling a house is hard because in addition to losing the house, it feels like losing the memories, too. Every corner of every room contained multiple memories, and being there was like traveling to the past. Each visit also created new memories, stacked on top of the old ones. There was always a special energy in the house, the vibrations of all those cherished moments. Spending time there flooded me with positive feelings. Almost everyone (animals included) I've ever cared for has spent time there.

But of course, memories stay with us, whether the house (or person, or pet) is with us or not. All we can do is cherish those memories.

Although I didn't live there, the house in Rhode Island has been in my life longer than any other home. I lived with my parents in Hartford for 14 years, then West Hartford for about 11 years (my parents have been in WH for 25 years total). But I have been celebrating birthdays and Independence Days, and spending weekends and summer weeks at the house in Rhode Island for 3 decades straight.

Four generations experienced that house, albeit not at the same time. My nieces and my grandmothers both spent time there. I remember being there with my grandmother, E-Mommy, while my parents were out. I jumped off the top deck and somehow hit my chin against my knee, almost biting my tongue off. I ran in crying and she calmed me down, soothed the injury, and told me not to worry about getting in trouble. Exactly what I needed to hear.

Even the things I hated as a kid bring back positive feelings now. When we were down there on the weekend, even when my friends were there, we always had to go to church, where a guy played guitar poorly and everyone sang poorly. But that was the price we had to pay to go to the flea market (which had cheap t-shirts and baseball cards) and the beach, or to get corn on the cob and rent a movie from the local video store.

There was a local video store! I remember watching Ace Ventura over and over for an entire weekend one time with a friend. For a long time we only had basic cable, so we didn't have many options if we didn't rent a movie. I remember watching many episodes of The Commish and Father Dowling's Mysteries. We also had a ton of puzzles and board games. My two favorite were always Pictionary and Pass the Pigs.

I loved being down there with friends, or just my brother and parents. I really liked the solitude as well. I had a lot of time to myself, and I read a lot. I also explored the woods around the house, but I never went too deep because the mosquitoes were monstrous. I loved the little stream next to the house, where ducks and geese would swim by and sometimes come up to the porch for bread. Until our dog Dakota caught one. They found another stream after that.

I also got to drive my Dad's old little red moped around town. I'd spend hours riding. If a friend was down there we'd alternate between the moped and a bike. I only ran out of gas once, and only fell off once. I also burnt my leg on the exhaust once and my hair still doesn't grow there. But I'll always think of the little red moped when I think of Rhode Island.

And the ice cream shop. Tropic Frost. It just wasn't a trip to Rhode Island without stopping there. My mom had to get her black raspberry chocolate chip. I had to get a massive hot fudge sundae. That was always a great way to end a day at the beach.

Early on we put up a basketball hoop in the driveway. Even though the court was mostly dirt and stones, we made the most out of it, until it was too rotted out. We also made the most out of the ping pong table, which was lopsided when we first got it. I don't know how it lasted a weekend let alone 30 years. If you leaned on it the whole thing collapsed. But I honed my ping pong skills there and now use my superior ping pong skills to beat kids at work.

Although I never really got into it, I remember fishing with my dad. Charleston Beach has the breachway, a large rock formation jutting out into the ocean. I liked climbing and walking on that more than the actual fishing, but I appreciate my dad taking me with him and teaching me. Even if I don't take up an activity, it doesn't mean I didn't enjoy or appreciate the experience. I mostly didn't like waking up early. Even though fishing wasn't my thing, there's nothing better than eating fish right out of the ocean. I vividly remember a blackfish he caught and cooked up. Before I really got into eating fish, I always loved eating what he caught, even though I could never join him in cleaning the fish.

I always preferred crabbing to fishing. Moonstone Beach had a great spot for blue crabs. There was a small sand bridge over a lagoon, right before the beach itself. We'd stand on the bridge and drop a fishing line tied to a big chicken drumstick into the water. When we first started, we'd see a dozen crabs scurrying after the chicken. When one grabbed on, we'd slowly pull it closer until we could reach it with a net, then scoop it right out. We'd catch ten in an hour. A couple giant snapping turtles lived in there, and we scooped those bad boys up, too. We'd immediately put them back but it was cool to watch them snapping their teeth at us. In later years, we'd be lucky to catch a couple crabs the entire afternoon. Maybe we overdid it those early years.

Of course, those weren't the only type of crabs you could catch at Moonstone Beach....I think that was the first place I saw the nude body of a stranger in real life. Going to a nude beach was...not exactly the experience I imagined it would be. Mostly because the beachgoers at Moonstone tended to be members of the AARP. It was one of my first experiences learning the value of limited expectations. But I also learned to appreciate body positivity and that people are entitled to do what they want with their bodies, even if they maybe shouldn't.

As I got older, my parents trusted my friends and I with the house for occasional getaways. We always managed to respect the house while enjoying ourselves. I even willingly swept the decks! Only once, the cops were called on us. Actually, it was twice but in the same night. The vast woods around the house carry every single sound, and apparently our neighbors didn't like our sing-a-long. But we loved it.

It would have been great to always have it as an option for vacations or weekends, but we're not rich, and healthcare is an expensive, tragic joke in this country. The house wouldn't be used enough to make it worthwhile. Holding on to it just for the sake of memories isn't realistic, and it wouldn't be fair, either. Houses are for people to use, not sit empty for 350 days of the year. It's a great house and space, and hopefully some other family or group of people can make the lasting memories that we did.

So, Elterich Cottage, thanks for the memories. Mom and Dad, thanks for providing this amazing place for me and Mike to experience during our formative years, and well beyond. Family and friends, thank you all for helping to make this place special. It will be greatly missed, but it's time to move on. So it goes.

I Love You All...Class Dismissed. 

The Last Grandparent

I never knew my grandfathers. One died before I was born, the other died shortly after. Luckily I had good relationships with my grandmothers, who lived into their 90s. But I was only 12 when my mom's mom died and 26 when my dad's mom died, so although I was lucky to have them in my life at all, I still feel like I didn't get enough time with them.

About 7 years ago, which was about 7 years after my last grandparent died, I received an unexpected gift: another grandmother. When my girlfriend Amy was sure enough about me to introduce me to the family, her own last grandparent, Pauline--Nani, immediately accepted me and loved me like only a grandmother can. I met her when she was in her late 80s, but with her short, grayish-white hair always perfectly permed, and a mind as sharp as her outfits, she looked and functioned like she was in her 60s. Whenever I saw her, she'd tell Amy and I how much she loved us and our relationship. It was always great to sit and chat with her, talking about her life growing up or about the trips Amy and I went on. Sometimes she'd complain about getting older but always with a wry sense of humor. Like many strong willed people, she seemed to resent the aging process, with the constant pain and not being able to function as she once did. Still, at 96, she was in incredible shape mentally and physically. But with that health came a sad irony: she outlived most of her family and friends. She never wallowed in despair, but she often acknowledged the loneliness she felt.

Despite the pain and loneliness of living for nearly an entire century, she seemed to relish her role as the family matriarch and she did her best to make it to every family function, where she'd always be the most highly revered guest, reminiscing with her kids and grandkids and playing with the greatgrandkids.

Recently she was diagnosed with lymphedema. Her time had come, and she was ready. Last week she began the process of entering hospice care, and early this week she passed away.

I was able to visit her a few days before she died. She was still herself, but her health was beginning to decline, and she becoming tired and a little confused. Morphine was also starting to have an effect on her capabilities, but at least it was taking her pain away. As she sat and talked with Amy and I, along with Amy's parents, we asked if she wanted lunch, knowing that it very well could be her last real meal. She looked at me and said, "You know what I want? A McDonald's cheeseburger."

So the 96 year old daughter of immigrants who grew up in Hell's Kitchen ate a McDonald's burger and fries for her last meal. I have never seen anything so American. I wanted to salute her and sing the National Anthem.

In all honesty, it was a perfect meal for the situation. Although I haven't eaten McDonald's in a while, it still reminds me of childhood, when a visit to McDonald's with the family was a special treat. McDonald's has gotten a bad rap over the years, and rightfully so. People eat it because it's quick and cheap, and it's undoubtedly contributed to the obesity epidemic, but it's an undeniable cultural marker and a part of most Americans' lives (maybe even most humans in general now). The meals can be very tasty, but I think we taste nostalgia more than the food itself. Food has the ability to bring us back to a specific time and place and emotion. The burger or chicken nugget is just a delivery system for joyful memories and feeling like a kid again. Nani didn't necessarily want a cheap burger, she wanted the memories of eating McDonald's with her family and friends throughout her life. It's called comfort food for a reason, and at this point, comfort was her number one priority.

I have many positive memories involving McDonald's, and now I can add one more very special memory to the list.

After eating, Nani made sure to tell us how much she loved Amy and I. She had also become somewhat close with my mom over the last few years, a bond formed by their battles with deteriorating health. She told me to give my mom her love and reminded me to always speak to my mom from my heart, a line so perfect it felt like dialogue from a Pulitzer Prize-winning novel.

She cried a bit, and it was clear she was afraid, but more than anything she was ready. I have never been so close to someone who knew they were dying soon. I know how emotional it was for me, so I can only imagine how it was for her. I don't think everyone has her strength in their final days. Having lived a good life helps with accepting death, I suppose. She had previously said that she was ready to die, but it was now an impending reality, and death is still the great unknown. Her mental capacities were working enough to know that death is scary regardless how prepared she was. But she was ready, and I only hope I can ever be as brave.

It's said that people often wait for "permission" from loved ones to finally let go; maybe that's the case, but she was not exactly the type to ask "permission." It felt more like she was satisfied with her life and ready for death, and she wanted her family to be ready as well. She waited for Christmas and the New Year (she made it 11 decades!). She waited until most family members saw her one last time, then she went on her own terms, surrounded by family. That's the best anyone can ask for, and it's what she deserved.

I only knew her for a few years, but I'm so grateful to have had her in my life. Everyone should get the opportunity to spend more time with a grandparent, especially one like her.

Goodbye, Nani, my last grandmother. You will be missed.

I Love You All...Class Dismissed. 

Prof Thuggy's Movie Reviews

I have written some movie reviews on this blog over the years and it's always fun, and I've always meant to do more, or at the very least, write personal journals or notes about movies, but I never motivated myself to do it. I generally watch movies for enjoyment, a way to relax, and although reviewing movies is fun, it's also a chore. Sometimes motivation needs to come from an outside source; money is a big motivator, but that's not happening for online movie reviews. Sometimes, the necessary motivation can come from something even simpler, like new technology or an app on your phone.

Letterboxd is an app that lets you easily rate and review any movie, and connects you with other people doing the same. Since I downloaded it in October, I've reviewed every movie I've watched. I hope people are enjoying reading the reviews as much as I enjoy writing them, but honestly I'm gonna keep doing them either way, you can't stop me!

I don't know why the app has motivated me so much. I could have easily logged into this site or opened the Notes app on my phone and reviewed any movie. I think a lot of little elements came together perfectly to finally overcome my laziness.

There's the social aspect of Letterboxd. There's a sense of "community" and it's easy to share reviews and find other people's reviews (although the interface could be a lot better). A lot of comedians and historians or just funny, knowledgeable people share their takes on movies. It's an easy to use writing app with a comprehensive movie database. Cast and crew, ratings, reviews, anything you want to know about a movie.

I love the simple 5 Star rating system that lets you easily compare your feelings about a movie to the public's. There's also a "like" button, which is an important distinction from a rating. My ratings aren't based completely on whether I "like" a movie or not. I don't like some very well made movies, but I like some very shitty movies. The "like" button gives a simpler yet more absolute take on the film. Did you enjoy the thing or not? I don't enjoy most 1-2 star movies, but I can definitely appreciate an over the top terrible 1-2 star movie with objectively horrible special effects, a dumb story, and awful acting (like Halloween 3). I may give a well made movie a 3 but I might not "like" it because it's dull or derivative or directed by Woody Allen. Or maybe it's not a genre that I overly enjoy; a beautifully made romantic period piece probably won't get more than a 3 and a half stars from me at best. Then again, I can appreciate most types of movies, from Citizen Kane to Road House (the Citizen Kane of redneck bar brawl movies) and I take into consideration the genre and the purpose of a movie when rating. There are different scales for different genres. I won't rate Dumb and Dumber on the same scale as Dunkirk because they have vastly different purposes. If a comedy succeeds at being funny, it gets a good rating. If a psychedelic mystery thriller succeeds at being trippy and mysterious and fun, it gets a good rating. Then there's horror. The quality of a horror film isn't just based on whether it's scary. A Nightmare on Elm Street is undoubtedly a classic and it's not scary at all. It's uniquely absurd. A horror movie can be considered a classic if it's really scary or creepy, or if it creates an interesting, unique mythos, or if it's extra gory, or if the special effects are really good, or if the special effects are reallly bad, or if it's purposely funny, or non-purposely funny. Horror is the most subjective of all genres. I think originality is the most important thing for a horror movie. It doesn't even need to be a completely original story, sometimes just an original spin on a story, or even an original spin on one part of a story, is enough. Shit, even if it's completely unoriginal but the story is told well, that can be a solid horror movie. Like the remake of Texas Chainsaw in 2003. Horror fans don't ask for much, and sadly, Hollywood still barely meets expectations.

Ultimately, I try to take in to account my personal feelings about the movie as well as the technical achievements of the film, like the acting, writing, special effects, cinematography, soundtrack, what have you, so I would never give something a 4 or 5 that I don't actually "like."

I put a lot of thought into my reviews and ratings. I agonize over a half star. But I'm doing that for myself. I don't care if I'm "right" or if anyone agrees. I try to use my knowledge of films and film history and the fundamentals of storytelling to inform my reviews and ratings, but I am mainly trying to clarify and document my own feelings for each movie I watch, so I rate movies by simply trying to compare each one to every other movie I've ever seen.

And let's be honest, I'm getting to that age where I don't remember every detail of every movie I've ever seen, and sometimes even main aspects of a movie, so this also serves as a reminder. Now to be fair, it's not all age, I've also seen a lot of movies in the last 40 years. I've read a lot of books, watched a lot of shows...it's hard to keep all this shit straight!

I also like the thought of having these reviews to read in the future. If I rewatch a movie I want to reread my review because something I love now might seem shitty in 10-20 years, like most 80's comedies. 

Most of all, reviewing movies is plain old fun. It's just talking movies, man! Show your appreciation, repeat your favorite lines, make fun of the actors, acknowledge some little unimportant but cool thing one of the actors did or maybe some little special effect failure that ruined the whole movie, try to figure out deeper meanings of the story, point out connections between other movies. I love telling people about good movies. The only thing I like more is telling people about bad movies. I also love arguing about movies. It's fun to disagree about whether a movie is good or shitty or The Best Movie of The Decade or The Worst Thing I've Ever Seen because...it literally doesn't matter. It's all entertainment. It's all opinion. It's the best type of argument because there can be no right or wrong. We can watch the exact same thing and even have the exact same understanding of it, and yet we can come to the exact opposite conclusion as far as whether it was "good" or not. I know some things about cinema and history and literature that help me appreciate and understand movies, but my opinion doesn't mean more than anyone else's. When it comes down to it, you like what you like, I like what I like and it doesn't matter, and we're both right. People get upset sometimes because we often identify closely with the entertainment we enjoy, so someone calling your favorite show garbage feels like someone calling you garbage. I assure you, it's not the same. Unless we're talking about the Big Bang Theory. That's a garbage show for garbage people.

But I'm thankful for Letterboxd, another technological innovation that has improved my life. We focus so much on the negative when it comes to technology. We either fantasize about technology taking over society and enslaving, or we complain about every new invention rotting the brains of the younger generation, even as adults use the same things. Think about what different technologies have allowed us to do throughout the ages, and think abut the backlash to each new invention. Internet and smartphones are "ruining" the youth now, but typewriters, calculators, even watches were all going to bring about the end of civilization. And while there certainly can be harmful elements to any technology (hello, guns!) most technology has served its purpose to vastly improve practical functions. I can write a lot more effectively and efficiently on a computer than with a pen or on a type writer. Hell, even guns keep getting better at their main function: killing.

Technology also gets blamed for influencing bad behavior because of ease of access. Again, that certainly holds true for guns, but think about porn as well (guns and porn, this is my most American post yet!). While porn was always huge, more people than ever can watch it or participate in it because the internet. Now, there's the whole argument about whether porn is "bad behavior" or not, but that's for another time. Regardless, I think technology influences behavior in positive ways more so than negative. Technology can provide a stimulant to act because of the ease of function, and while that may lead to more porn, it can lead to more creative writing or research or even healthier living. I'm doing these reviews now because it's easier than it's ever been, and I started exercising more recently because I found a cheap yet quality stationary bike that I can easily ride while watching movies on Netflix on the big screen in my living room . Thanks, scientists and engineers!

If you want to join the fun, download Letterboxd or visit their website. Follow me, Prof Thuggy, at https://letterboxd.com/realearl13/

I Love You All...Class Dismissed. 

9 Albums That Built Me

The hashtag #9goodalbums was going around social media a while back and I figured I'd finally give it a whirl. This list is supposed to contain 9 good albums that "built me," and generally I stay away from these things because I hate limiting my influences/favorites. 9 spots could never actually cover the albums that had a major impact on me. Inevitably, a few great ones are left off, but so be it. Gotta start somewhere.

The following albums are mostly from my youth. There have been incredible albums in the last 20 years, but I've found that with most people (myself included) the most "influential" music is generally that which you first fall in love with.

Motley Crue - Girls Girls Girls

A "Best of The Beach Boys" cassette is one of my earliest memories of music. I think it was my parents' tape, but I grew very attached to it. I loved their intense positivity and vocal harmonizing. It always felt like I was being whisked away to a California beach when I listened to them. I even had a Beach Boys windbreaker. 

My Dad also had several "Best of Motown" cassettes, with the greatest hits from each year of Motown's heyday. Between that and listening to the Oldies station on the radio during long car rides, I was exposed to a lot of older music, which I'm very thankful for. As I grew up, I was able to see the influence on current music, and even recognize some samples and reconfigured melodies.

Most of the stuff I listened to as a very young kid could be described as "pretty" and melodic. Then came Motley Crue. I saw a video (probably Smoking in the Boys Room, from their previous album) and it opened up a whole new world of possibilities. It was the anti-establishment, don't give a fuck attitude I didn't even know I needed. These were hard rocking, long haired weirdos with motorcycles and girls all around them, the essence of cool to a prepubescent boy. 

I loved Motley Crue for a while. They rocked out, they had singable hits, they were fucking crazy...Nikki Six was literally dead from a heroin overdose, paramedics revived him, and he went right back for more heroin! That's a rock star!

I don't think I was even "into" girls when this came out, but this album let me know that liking girls was cool. It also told me that long hair, leather, motorcycles, and smoking in the boy's room were cool, but somehow, those things never caught on with me.

DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince - He’s the DJ, I'm The Rapper 

This album changed my musical direction for good. I had enjoyed some rap songs before this point. I liked Run DMC, some Biz Markie, Tone Loc. But I was still mostly into Motley Crue and Van Halen. When this album and its videos came out, hip hop took over my musical preferences completely.

Will's charisma and humor always got the spotlight, which coincided with the larger trend in hip hop of MCs starting to take the spotlight from the DJs, who were always top billing up to this point. Technically, Jeff even had top billing in this group, and with good reason: he was a phenomenal, one-of-a-kind DJ. Without his backing, Will Smith may never have been the global megastar he is today. The Fresh Prince persona brought people in, but Jeff kept them coming back. Despite the success of Will's solo music career, the quality of his later music just never compared to his Fresh Prince days.

This album has the obvious hit singles (Parents Just Don't Understand, Nightmare on My Street) but the album cuts are the true gems. Here We Go Again, Brand New Funk, Charlie Mack - First Out the Limo. Insanely fun jams that still hold up. Then there was Human Video Game with Ready Rock C doing beatbox versions of Sanford and Sons underwater....just awesome stuff. Live at Union Square gives a good glimpse of how well Will and Jeff rocked a crowd, and how well they represented the fundamental elements of hip hop.

As silly and "commercial" as Fresh Prince could be, this album is truly iconic, a highlight of 80s hip hop that withstands the test of time.

Leaders of the New School - A Future Without a Past

This was an incredibly influential album in my life, which I purchased because I thought Scenario was on it. I ended up buying The Low End Theory for Scenario, and that is one of my favorite albums of all time (which I didn't include here because I talked about it enough already) so it all worked out, and I learned two things: always check the track list, and you can never go wrong when Busta Rhymes is involved.

Ok, maybe not never.

Similar to Fresh Prince, these guys were funny as hell. This album took on some serious issues (Just When You Thought It Was Safe, Too Much on My Mind), but always with a smirk and a snap about your mother. They all had their own identity and style, but on this album everything meshed perfectly. There's a 12 minute outro where they thank people in their lives and shout out other rap groups, and I could still sit and listen to the whole thing.

A few years later, Busta Rhymes began his ascent to hip hop superstardom. Sadly, they only have one other album together, which is also good. I always loved Busta (he blew my mind on Scenario) but Chalrie Brown may have been my favorite. Pinocchio's Theory is such a bizarre and awesome song. And Dinco D is still underrated.

Gang Starr - Daily Operation

I heard Take it Personal on BET Rap City and I was transfixed. How could this mellow, smooth-voiced short dude sound so menacing? My head was bobbing uncontrollably and I wanted to hit someone over the head with a pool cue for stuntin on me. The scratches on the chorus were beautiful; besides Jazzy Jeff, I had never heard scratching sound so majestic. The beat was hypnotizing, with those interjecting piano keys looped throughout.

Then I heard Ex Girl to the Next Girl, with those horns? I had to have the tape.

But there was a problem. It had an Explicit Lyrics sticker (Thanks Tipper Gore!) and I was 11 years old. When I went to the mall with the family, I split off and went to Sam Goody, where I quickly purchased it (thanks, non-caring Sam Goody employees!) with the money I made weed whacking. Then I carefully peeled off the sticker before showing it to my parents. Honestly though, it was barely explicit. It had a few swears, but I think labels were just tossing stickers onto every rap album.

This album also introduced Jeru the Damaja and Group Home, artists I loved for a while. Gang Starr made a couple classics after this (Hard to Earn, Moment of Truth) but there's a special place in my heart for this album.

Wu-Tang Clan - Enter the Wu-Tang: 36 Chambers

Whew. Enter the Wu-Tang. What the hell was this? Do people understand what it was like to hear this album in 1993? Like nothing I had heard before.

I heard M.E.T.H.O.D. Man a few times, including once at a roller skating jam at Bulkeley High School that my mom must've been chaperoning because I was still in middle school. It was cool, and Meth had that star charisma, but it didn't stand out that much. But then came Mystery of Chessboxin. The video. The beat. The lyrics. Mindblowing. It was like the comic books I loved and kung fu movies I had seen on Saturday afternoons coming together to create an atomic bomb of awesomeness. They had the same attitude and vibe as Motley Crue, except with timbs, jeans, and hoodies instead of leather pants and long hair. They had the same energy and cohesiveness as Leaders of the New School and A Tribe Called Quest. There were so many different styles and voices that you were bound to connect with at least one.

This album was hard as hell, but what often gets overlooked by hip hop albums deemed "gangster" or "street" is the humor. Try not to laugh during the "torture" skit. The Coen Brothers can barely do dark humor that well (one of my favorite movies ever is Fargo, which came out 3 years after this). There is wit and a dark humor throughout the album that better illuminates the tragic realities these guys were exposing. And the music...the grittiness, the grooves, the sound effects....everything combined to create this pure, unique musical experience that has still never been matched.

Their next album is also a classic (and the two after that are good) and several of the members have classic solo albums, but nothing could ever match this album's impact and appeal. Soowoo! 

Redman - Dare iz a Darkside

This is one of my all time favorite albums and Redman's entire persona and discography is hugely influential to me.

From the album cover (a reference to Funkadelic, which I didn't even get until years later) to the red cassette tape, to Redman's frenetic energy, absurdist humor, and magnetic charisma, I can't say enough about this. It came out my freshman year of high school which was not a good year for me overall. Redman provided me with a much needed release. I could lose myself every time  I put on my headphones and listened. But I could also find myself. Thanks to Redman and especially this album, I realized I could be different and weird and upend expectations. This was a departure from his previous album (which is also great) and was met with a lot of skepticism and criticism. But the music and the man were undeniable. This was who he was and the music he wanted to make, and you were going to love it.

After this album, he made several more classics, which sold even better, and he shot to superstardom with Method Man. When Redman made it, I felt like a part of me had made it. I mean, watch his Cribs episode and tell me you don't love that guy and want to root for him forever.


Outkast - Southernplayalisticadillacmuzik

For a while, I didn't want to believe Southern rappers were good. I liked Geto Boys but that was about it. Hell I barely gave West Coast rap a fair shot. Nothing could beat the East Coast!

Then came Andre and Big Boi, putting all that to rest. Their accents and their vibe and the local references I didn't quite understand drew me in. All of a sudden, the notion that geography mattered when it came to music seemed absurd. At 13/14 years old, "cool" meant more than anything, and these motherfuckers were cool. They had taken the mantle from Motley Crue and rock stars. They even made Atlanta Braves gear seem cool and I hate the Braves!

They, Andre especially, grew increasingly weird over the next albums (all verifiable classics) but the quirkiness was apparent here. They embraced their black, Southern culture completely and wore it as a badge of honor. And they were so cool and confident that the mainstream had no choice but to embrace them eventually.

I love all their albums (except the Idlewild soundtrack, which was still decent) but this and Aquemini are by far the most influential. Aquemini was a staple at college. They had grown so much as artists and people, yet the're chemistry together was even better; they were diving deeper into personal and social issues, and they were even weirder. To be honest, I could have put Atliens or Stankonia here, too. But this is where it all started, so it gets the nod.

Mobb Deep - The Infamous

I was 14/15 years old, unhappy at school, going through puberty...I needed something, I didn't even know what it was. It turns out, I needed two teenagers from Queensbridge to make one of the most sinister, neck-breaking, face-punching hip hop classics of all time.

Mobb Deep had Outkast's coolness but with a side of menace. There wasn't much quirkiness or humor either. This shit was dark. The beats somehow made you want to simultaneously zone out and think about the meaning of life while punching everyone who ever wronged you. I refused to wear any boots besides Timberlands for a decade because of this album. This album sounds like a harsh winter spent in an alley playing cee-lo for shots of Hennessey. This album sounds like teens working through depression in an unbelievably harsh environment...because that's what it was. And it is beautiful. 

Danny Brown - XXX

I had to put this on here because this album was the beginning of a new era in hip hop to me. The late 2000s were particularly slow/weak for hip hop. There were some solid acts out there, and some veterans still making good music, but it had grown pretty stagnant. I had gotten really into downtempo/trip hop/instrumental acts like Bonobo and Blockhead. Rappers were starting to bore me. It was on Blockhead's blog where I first heard of Danny Brown. Blockhead was raving about him. I then saw a few other blog posts doing the same, and I finally checked him out.

He was definitely unique. I didn't take to his music right away, and I think he purposely makes it not easily accessible, especially beginning with this album. But I dug his originality and wit and overall vibes. Then I gave this album a focused listen, and it finally hit me. This was what and who I had been waiting for for a decade, at least since ODB passed, or since the last proper Outkast album dropped. Hip hop had life again. Excitement. It was breaking boundaries.

During the recording of this album, Danny was dealing with turning 30 and reflecting on his life...at the same time I was turning 30. I can't exactly say I lived a similar life, but I could definitely relate to the emotions he was expressing about getting older, worrying about running out of time, worrying about whether he'd ever be good enough, etc.

Plus he was just funny as hell. And once I got used to his high pitched yelp, I could hardly listen to any artist with a regular voice anymore.

Although Danny was 30 and had been making music for years, he was still part of a "new school" of rappers that I discovered around this time. After hearing XXX, I wanted to check out what other new artists were doing, and I discovered Schoolboy Q and Black Hippy, Roc Marciano, Freddie Gibbs (all artists who Danny has worked with). My faith in hip hop was restored. Thanks Danny!

I Love You All...Class Dismissed.