Thursday, December 4, 2014

Stoned Willy Tears Down False Idols: Cosby Edition

Yoooo yoooo yooooooo! Tha fuck is goin on in this country? Holy shit. I go to Zanzibar wit sum fly honeys fer a month poppin bottles n shroomin on tha warm sand a tha Indian Ocean n I come bak to cops gettin away wit murder? Dam. Well Ima save that conversation fer another day n take action n go ta NYC n march wit tha people on tha right side a history, but I need ta get sum otha shit off my chest first.

Yea u already know i like ta drop hot turds a knowledge on errbody's head like a philosopher pigeon from on high, n i like to shake up people's worldview a lil bit like a Weltanschauung Snowglobe  nahmean, but when i get ta do both AND shit on a widely respected celebrity who had tha whole world fooled inta believin he was tha beacon a goddam morality for 40 years, talkin down to black youth n holdin himself up as tha perfect role model, when in reality he's complete sewage water, well that jus makes my fuckin day. At this point, shittin on this particular piece a filth is almost like beatin a dead horse, or bangin a drugged-up, sleepin woman, so in that sense its only right I keep shittin on him.

Yea, turns out tha bearer of bad sweaters, tha puddin pop prince, tha voice of a Junkyard generation, Bill Motherfuckin Cosby, is a serial fuckin rapist.

I know how hard this is ta accept for sum muthafuckas out there. I get it. We all loved ole Bill. Back in tha day, he was tha father we all wish we had. All he brought inta our lives was laughter n joy, n wutever tha fuck Leonard Pt 6 was. We all got our own Cosby zippity boppp zoop zoppp impression down. Trust, I get all that. But all that matters now is:

Fuck Bill Cosby.

It sucks ta say. He helped shape my entire outlook on life man! I gave jazz music a chance cuz a him! I cut holes in my winter hats n wore em over my eyes cuz a him!

Still do, if we're keepin it 100.

Well all that shit is null n void. Yer boy Bill is a piece a shit. It hurts, but not as much as gettin raped. It aint about our feelins dickheads, its about makin it right for his victims.

His many, many victims. There's 20 names on that fuckin list, n thats jus who came forward so far!

Fuck Bill Cosby. N strait up, fuck us for lettin it happen. Yea, WE let it happen. Cuz we don't wanna let go a our childhoods, or our childhood heroes. We been puttin actors n artists on a pedestal forfuckinever, unaffected by tha laws reserved fer us common folk. Celebrity culture perpetuates this shit. N rape culture perpetuates this shit. Fuck man, we laughed when he did an entire bit about druggin girls n sexin em up back in tha day.

Ha! Druggin women n bangin em is jus good clean family fun!

That was a different time tho right? We aint know any better all tha way back 1979. Shit.

Then in 1993, when Autumn Jackson claimed she was his illegitimate kid, we aint believe it cuz she was blackmailin him n clearly a lil crazy. Naw, he wouldnt do that, even tho he admitted havin an affair wit Autumn's mom. Still...he's America's Dad! He made a lil mistake, but he was Cliff Huxtable! He wrote tha damn book "Fatherhood." Shit!

2006 musta been a different time too, cuz wen Andrea Constand accused him a sexual assault, n 13 others were set ta testify against him for tha same thing, we forgot all about it wen they settled outta court. No trial, no testimony, no disgrace for ole Bill, n we can all watch The Cosby Show reruns wit a clear conscience.

We let that go cuz it was Bill n we loved him n couldnt get over his image of America's Dad, but we really let it go cuz they settled outta court. When that shit happens, 9 times outta 10 people jump on tha "she did it for money" train faster than Wesley n Woody n J-Lo. Shit, I hope she got a ton a his fuckin money, n Im glad she aint hav ta expose her life in a trial. Thas what stops most rape victims from comin forward. They gotta reveal their entire fuckin existence, relive tha fuckin tragedy, n then deal wit most people not believin em n even blamin em. Thats rape culture. How fucked is that? Fuck is wrong wit yall?

Well now it is a different time. A time of social media. A time of a lil bit more (a tiny bit, like, fuckin infinitesimal) understandin a sexual assault n its victims. N this shit aint goin away Billbo Baggin Sleepin Women. Yer upcomin NBC show? Cancelled. Yer comedy special on Netflix? Cancelled. Reruns of The Cosby Show on TV Land? Pulled. Your position at Temple University? Gone. That perfect Dad image ya delicately crafted fer 40 years? Ruined.

View image on Twitter

View image on Twitter

View image on Twitter
Fer better or worse, memes make people aware a issues in a way that news articles jus can't touch. 
Damn I love social media.

Dahh well! Should we feel sorry for him? Should we feel sorry for ourselves now that we can't enjoy a part a our childhood like we used ta? Answer ta both: fuck no. Fuck him n fuck you. Tha only people that deserve sympathy are tha victims.

But thats tha effect a rape culture. It makes us start ta believe shit like tha real victims aren't tha ones who were raped, tha real victims are tha guy accused a rape. We find reasons fer it happenin. She shouldnta been with him at night dressed like that. She shouldnta been drinkin. N it goes beyond jus rape. Its like every violent crime now. Blame tha unarmed guy fer gettin killed. He committed a crime 5 years ago. He had marijuana in his system. It's evrybody's fault but tha guy who pulled tha trigga.

It's crazy tha lengths people go ta blame victims, rape victims especially. Always talkin bout what she shoulda done ta avoid it. Why should she have ta adjust her entire life accordin ta tha oppression she faces? Dont question tha fucked up behavior a men or why society accepts it, question her fer not bein able ta avoid it? Seriously, fuck is wrong wit yall?

It's time ta accept tha realities a tha rape culture we hav allowed ta grow n flourish, n it's time ta accept that a lotta our idols ain't who we think they are, or who we want them ta be. A lotta  us learned that wit Joe Paterno, but we also saw some muthafuckas refuse ta learn that lesson n what they are willin ta do ta avoid reality...

Fuck Joe Paterno. Fuck Bill Cosby. Fuck rapists n rape apologists n Men's Rights fuckin Asstivists. N fuck these assholes who think their fame, money, or power or all three will protect them forever from any consequences.

Maybe yer askin how im so certain ole Bill is a piece a shit. I could just say I can do minimal fuckin research n fuckin read n anyone who can do those two things should be able to make up their fuckin minds at this point, but I see where yer comin from. Its America, innocent until proven guilty n all that. N thats a great theory, we jus never follow it. I get tha appeal tho. Justice is blind and treats errbody equal n nobody should make up their mind until tha court does n then tha decision has to be accepted as truth. Nice n simple right? Well, besides tha fact that jurors are fuckin ignorant about tha law, n money buys a better chance at justice, n mistakes happen all tha time, n tha court system is hilariously (maybe not so hilarious tho?) broken in general, rape accusations are a bitch ta prove in court. So, many times, victims settle outta court ta avoid tha intrusion inta their personal lives, like Constand in 2006.

In her case, since they settled outta court, tha 13 other accusers aint have ta testify. Many a those same women are comin forward, along wit many others, after my man Hannibal Buress blew Ole Bill's spot up in a stand-up act in Philly. These women got no hope a gettin money from him or even a conviction. They literally get nuthin outta this except peace a mind...n horrible fuckin people accusin them a lyin n deservin wutever they got n sayin they r just doin it fer money. Then ya got assholes always askin why they waited so long ta come forward. Well, besides tha reasons i already listed (like tha fact that nobody wants ta admit publicly they were violated n then hav ta deal wit all tha doubt n accusations a lyin) THEY FUCKIN DID COME FORWARD BEFORE. N NOBODY WANTED TA HEAR THAT SHIT! So, question fuckin society, question our fuckin selves, before question them.

Oh, n now there is another lawsuit by a whole different person. This one could be tha one that takes Billbo down too, cuz tha woman was a minor when it happened, n statute of limitations don't apply. I hope she gets ALL yer money Bill, ya sick fuck.

I've heard people defendin him like they know him, when all we know is his act. His act was great (well, The Cosby Show n Fat Albert n Ghost Dad were great). That shit don't mean HE is great. Big fuckin difference. People got a hard time separatin tha artist from tha art. He plays a funny, friendly family man, so he gotta be one in real life! What kinda logic is that? Christian Bale played a fucked up crazy psycho in American Psycho, but that dont mean he's crazy in real life.

Ok, bad example, but ya get wut Im sayin.

N Cosby did sum great things in life, fo sho. Still dont make this shit any better. Wen u rape or kill, all tha good shit u did gets tossed out tha window immedjutly. Hitler loved dogs (who dont, right? RIGHT?) but that dont pardon tha shit he did ta my Hebrew brothas n sistas nahmsayin?

Anyways, here's a few reboots tha Cosby team is workin on ta revive his career. I personally cant wait ta see all this shit!

The Cosby Show Me Where He Touched You

I Spy (A Rapist)

Gross Dad

Rapetown Saturday Night

Leonard Part 7: You Know You Want It

The Cosby Mysteries Continued

Fat Albert and The Gang Rape

Picture Pages and Pages of Rape Accusations

Ok, now it feels like an excuse ta write as many rape jokes as possible rather than jus shittin directly on Cosby, so let me finish by sayin this:

Fuck Bill Cosby.

Spread World Peace...Stop Willfully Protecting abusers. 

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