Wednesday, December 21, 2011

WTF is the Internet?!


So before I go full on into this blogging thing, I wanted to take you on a tour of my blog so you can more easily navigate the landscape of “Of intersections and strange things told.”
First off, welcome to my world. You will be gaining unlimited access into the mind of one of our generation’s greatest drin…excuse, me…thinkers. Blogger has been so kind to give me a free platform to excrete my wisdom all over your monitors, and I thank them for it.
Underneath the first panel of flaming motorcyclist and the title of this blog, you will see a long white rectangle. On the left side it says, “email address…” and on the right side it has a button that says “submit”. Enter your email address and submit to receive up to the minute emails notifying you of a recent post; because when I publish a thought, you need to know immediately. You can also hit the button on the top of the page labeled “Follow.” Or you can click the “join this site” button on the right hand side. Also on the right side, you will find my archives (which will hopefully be growing steadily) and my followers (which will also be growing steadily, hopefully). You can help my legion of followers grow by clicking the “share” button on the top left hand side of the page and sharing my posts on your preferred social media site(s). You can also email or reblog or repost or repog by clicking one of the icons on the bottom of each post (underneath my name). Back to the top, you can also view the next random blog on this website Blogger, but when I did, I just saw a Ginger family photo album. The internet is a scary thing. Be careful out there.
Last and not least, but it’s close to being least. I mean, if it was more important, I would have mentioned it earlier, right? Anyway, at the bottom of my page, you will see links to other websites that I like, under the title “These are cool.”
Cracked.com is a humor site you need to check out. I really can’t speak highly enough of it, and it truly played a major part in my decision to start this blog. It’s humor is right up my alley. It’s a dark, twisted alley, and I hope to be writing in that alley one day.
My Back Pages is a blog from former Alderman of New Britain Jason Jakubowski. Jay was another major inspiration for this blog, as he started one recently, and I said, “If Jay Jakubowski can write a blog goddamit…”. Kidding, Jay. It’s an enjoyable read and honestly, a big influence. 
Phat Friend is a blog by producer Blockhead, one of my favorite producers ever. Funny stories and opinions, and he talks about the music industry, which is cool.
Spoven Weedle Presents…well, the name says it all. Check it out. My man Nick Jake holding down the Weedle brand on the blogosphere.
Victory-Light is probably the most hilarious blog I’ve ever read. Crass, vulgar, rude, and written in the most original style on the web by some guy called The Kid Mero, this site is the most consistently funny thing on the web.
So, those are cool. But make sure you read my blog first, then show them some love.
There are links to videos on the bottom by some crazy  sumbitch, but the videos are not for the faint of heart. Neither is this blog, though, and if you’ve made it this far, you might as well check out the videos (it helps to know the original songs that they parody, but they’re so ridiculous to begin with it doesn’t even matter).
So there you go. I hope to keep you entertained for a few minutes out of your day. And no matter what I say, it’s all out of love and it comes from the heart. Or, pulled directly from my ass so don’t take it too seriously.
I Love You All…Class Dismissed.
P.S. If you can tell me where my closing line comes from, you get a prize (of no monetary value whatsoever).

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